Surgery Week-So many unknowns

 Hi Friends!

I wanted to find a space to write about Leanna. Her struggles, surgeries, and most importantly, her wins! I usually keep people updated on Facebook, but I have realized over the years that FB can be a pretty judgy space. I have dealt with some crazy stuff in that space, particularly in the last year. My thought is this; if someone wants to take the time to click a blog link, and read my chaotic word salad, they must be here for the right reasons!

So, the nitty gritty. It is surgery week. 

On Friday, Leanna will have a full enucleation of her left eye. The irony is that this has always been her good eye, the right eye has been on borrowed time for years. But that is a story for a different day.

Leanna has procedures multiple times a year. We monitor a benign brain tumor, we need yearly scopes to see if her esophageal ulcers have returned, Leanna gets eye exams under sedation yearly.....there is always something. I have always been good about tackling each challenge and getting on the flip-side. But, this surgery is hard. We don't know what to expect. Having a child with autism, sensory processing challenges, and who is prone to self-harm behaviors? Well that just adds to the question marks. 

Leanna's eyes have always been a mystery to us, and to all of the medical professionals who have treated her over the years. We really have no idea why her eye took such a bad turn the end of Nov, it was sudden and unexpected. In case there is anyone here who is a tad squeamish, I have not included photos from her exams, but here are a couple that Sean and I took.

So. please send prayers. We will take them. I will try to keep posting here, as we go through this crazy time, and uncharted territory. 

It can be very lonely being a special needs Mom and Dad. It's hard to explain what I mean by that, and maybe I will tackle it in another post. But ultimately, your circle gets smaller, you have lots of people question every decision you make, you have to fight constantly, you learn to tag team with your spouse, so you don't lose your mind. There are so many challenges. But, in the end, the joy far outweighs the stress. 

Our Leanna is the strongest person I know. And when she laughs, it can make my entire week, because she means it. Her laughs are complete, uninhibited, face scrunching JOY. Here is to hoping that we don't need to wait too many days, post-surgery, to hear that laugh.